


Grow Together

by OrangeBlossoms



Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen, Post-Canon, Sibling Bonding, fegenweek2018, prompt: grow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-09
Updated: 2018-01-09
Packaged: 2019-03-02 12:45:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13318392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OrangeBlossoms/pseuds/OrangeBlossoms
Summary: Lissa visits Emmeryn in Ferox.





	Grow Together

**Author's Note:**

> Emmeryn’s been in Ferox for a few years in this. I just wanted her to find some peace after everything she's been through and write some sibling bonding stuff (with some background Lissa/Maribelle). Took a different tack than canon in this where she survives, but is not the same as her paralogue self. I really didn’t like the way that was handled… I’m also not big on amnesia. (Posting just a tad bit early as I'm not sure I'll be near a desktop tomorrow.)
> 
> For Fire Emblem General Week. 
> 
> Day 3: Growth

There had been an early snow this year, complicating and ultimately delaying her return plans. The view from the glazed window that greeted her when she woke several days ago had resulted in a muddled assortment of feelings she hadn't taken the time to figure out despite a multitude of opportunities in the muted hours by the fireside. Flurries from the previous evening had turned into a storm overnight. It was still too early in the season for all the leaves to have fallen and there were several times during the day where the stillness outside shattered with a crack and groan of thick branches as they gave way to the weight of the wet snow as it clung to the leaves. She had gone out and helped the neighbors clear several downed trees that had fallen in the strip of land in between Emmeryn’s home and their own. One of their children had shown up on the doorstep later that evening with an apple tart in thanks.

Her retinue was staying at the town inn. She had given them leave for the week, not interested in having Cordelia and Sully’s freshly minted knights and cavaliers underfoot. Their youngest flier, a promising recruit on her first assignment outside of Ylisse, had already struck out for Ylisstol as soon as the threat of the late fall storm dissipated to deliver the news of the delay. The skies were safer nowadays.

Chrom had become less protective of her over the years with daughters to dote on and worry over in her place. Maribelle had not, but Lissa knew how to communicate with her in a way that would assuage her concerns. She had remained in Ylisse with the boys, reluctant to leave them in anyone’s care for the duration of the trip. Her work had also been a consideration, but she promised they would make the journey again when their children were older.

The sharp snap of the crackling fire on one end of the room called her attention. A long-haired cat the size of a dog basked in the heat from the flames exposing its belly to the warm air that rolled off the logs into the room. Emmeryn had said he had sauntered up to her one day by the wall at the edge of town, one ear sheared nearly clean off and patches of fur missing from a scuffle she doubted was with another cat. Wallace, as she had dubbed him, had patiently allowed her to heal his wounds and had remained a stolid companion ever since. The two housemates had a respectful affinity as they went about their business, the cat following Emmeryn as she ran errands and from room to room during the times they were at home.

Lissa eyed the pile of bricks set to the side of the fire to be lined up near the hearth and then wrapped in rags as a source of warmth when they retired for the evening. She hadn't packed enough for such cold temperatures and was sure she'd get an earful about it when she got back as it had been her choice to not take half of her wardrobe in order to have several somethings for every potential occasion as _someone_ who regularly overpacked had advised her to do.

The borrowed ensemble of fur-lined clothes were not enough in the chill of the night and she yearned for the company of her wife as she curled up alone under layers of mismatched blankets in the guest room. None of the clothing fit quite right either. Emmeryn was taller, her graceful arms longer. She still had the soft hands of a noble, yet another point of contrast that she mulled over as she chopped wood on one of the first days of her stay, Wallace monitoring her progress with a critical eye. He had trotted behind her, tail held high as she hauled in a bundle and replenished the stock. Even then the sky had been cool gray marked with a smattering of heavy clouds, warning of the incoming snow.

With the exception of her feline companion, Emmeryn lived alone. She was under the protection of the Khans and would have been welcome to reside with either ruler, but wished for a simpler life when she moved to Ferox. She appeared to have a good relationship with the other villagers. A sage as skilled as herself would be a welcome addition to most hamlets. She took healing assignments, mostly human patients, but could assist with animals when needed. There was no hiding who she was, the brand of the Exalt still firmly imprinted on her forehead. No normal villager would receive periodic visits from Khans and foreign royalty, though Lissa had an easier time than Chrom traveling without announcing her station even with all her assigned ducklings in tow.

After the wars, when Emmeryn expressed her desire to leave, it had pricked painfully at first, her shoulders weighed down by the irrational thought that she was losing her family again. That Emmeryn would be stolen away for a third time: first to duty, then to sacrifice and finally to the stranger her sister had become.

After the initial fear of loss, the news went from rending to gnawing as she perceived it a personal rejection. She wasn't being fair and she was aware of that, but a part of her couldn’t help her worries as old impressions of inadequacy were dredged up.

She wasn’t serious enough.

She wasn’t strong or smart enough.

She didn’t care the right amount about the right things.

She just wasn’t _good_ enough. For her friends, her family, her country.

When Maribelle caught her muttering self-disparaging remarks, she had done her best to listen and soothe, the process repeated again during her lowest moments.

Her sister was her own person and capable just as she herself had become and she knew she needed to respect that. It was a mantra she told herself as she attempted to fulfill her usual role of emotional support to her siblings. Chrom had been less vocal in his reaction, but she knew the stubborn way he set his jaw or clenched a first. She nearly fell over herself trying to make amends, attempting to smooth it all over even as she fell apart some evenings, crying over trivial things like spilled tea.

Finally, there was the guilt she felt over not spending enough time with Emmeryn during the period she did live in Ylisstol. Until she had settled down with her wife, Lissa had spent most of the several years following Grima’s defeat away from the capital (and from court) traveling on assignments from Chrom. Perhaps if she had visited with her more often or spent more time in Ylisstol those first few years… There had been little opportunity to make up for it until now and she had was nearly as daunted by the prospect as she had been when she lifted her first axe, hands uncertain and volleys often missing their intended target.

The first several days had been difficult. She had strained to fill in the silence, rehashing thoughts that would get tangled like the yarn Emmeryn was currently attempting to show her how to knit. She still lacked the patience to learn skills that required precision. Her tension was uneven which resulted in her first attempt at a scarf being almost triangular with large loopy stitches at one end and tight, beady knits at the other. Emmeryn had laughed pleasantly at the end product and helped her unravel everything before consoling her that she had experienced similar when she was first learning.

“I find it hard to believe you made anything _this_ bad, Emm,” she said, tugging too tightly at a bunch in frustration.

“Mmm you might be surprised,” she responded, voice still warm with laughter, “If something looks effortless, it most likely means you haven't seen the work that has gone into it.”

Lissa wondered at the statement, Emmeryn’s words now flowed clearly, whatever obstruction worked through on her own or through some means unbeknownst to her.

“Weeell, I guess,” she hummed, beginning her project anew.

Several hours later found them drinking tea from one of the tins Maribelle had picked out as a gift for Emmeryn though Lissa suspected she meant for her to share with her sister as she had slipped in several of her favorite blends. Somehow they had fallen into the routine of having tea at the same time she would have at home, minus the usual discussion and the sound of the boys playing in the background. Not for the first time that day she pondered over what they would be up to in Ylisse. It was more difficult than she would like to admit to be so far away, all her other trips from the past several years only taking her from her family for no more than a couple weeks at a time.

She had wrapped a knit blanket over her shoulder earlier, the design made up of thick cables meant to represent curling vines. It wasn’t enough to keep out the Feroxi weather or the futile wish to be two places at once. There would be heartache when it was time to leave, as much as she anticipated a joyful reunion among faces and sounds that were more familiar to her.

As the cup in her hand lost some of its warmth, she remembered being ten again. Small and wiry and full of laughter because it made others smile. She had all the time in the world and none of the direction. That didn’t come until much later. Visits with Emm were just as brief and even more fraught with disquiet though she didn’t understand all the reasons why at the time. Everyone always seemed so important, more useful and essential than she could ever even aspire to be. There was a painful comfort in the memories.

“Is something the matter?” Emmeryn asked, still serene even as her brows knit slightly.

Her grip tightened on the mug, its contents tepid. There was a humorless chuckle that followed as she touched her cheek, tips of her fingers now cold.

“I mean, it’s nothing to worry about. I just… It’s strange to think how many things have changed.” She paused, a rueful smile slanting across her face. “Or how many haven’t.”

“What do you mean?” she asked, turning in her seat to face her.

“Oh, I just really always wanted to be like _you_ , you know? Or maybe you didn’t. And it’s so dumb because I _still_ feel bad about it! Not bad that I wanted to be like you because you’re amazing… just that I wasn’t…” She averted her eyes, swallowing a thickness that was holding back her thoughts. “Fit… to be like… you.”

Emmeryn slowly nodded to herself, sighing as she relaxed into her chair before drawing the cup to her lips and taking another sip, a thoughtful expression smoothing over some of the lines on her face. Before she could respond, Lissa barreled forward again with her thoughts.

“Not that I need to be! I _know_ it’s stupid and maybe I don’t even make any sense?” Lissa continued, gazing into the depths of her cup. “But I—”

A hand on her own stopped her. Their eyes met and she felt a jolt at Emmeryn’s wavering smile.

“It’s alright,” she said, “We never expected you to be me, Chrom and I. Just yourself. It sounds trite to say it that way, but I never wished what I went through on either of you. I didn’t want you to have the same burdens, but you all grew up and found your own challenges,” she paused, a gleam in her eye, “and triumphs.”

“Would you ever consider coming back?” Lissa asked, worried she knew the answer and regretting the words as soon as they left her mouth.

Emmeryn grimaced slightly, her hand running through her hair, pulled back in a loose braid. It was shorter than it had been before, but still enough to hang past her shoulders.

“Ah, it had nothing to do with you or Chrom… why I left. Once you become something beyond yourself, your person no longer belongs to you,” she said before going quiet a moment, the crackling of the fire and the wind murmuring outside the only sounds. “There was no peace in Ylisstol for me. Here I can be someone else, but someone who is mostly my own even if that’s still a bit of pretend.”

“Oh,” Lissa said, shifting in her chair.

It made sense in its own way. Emmeryn’s name still caused a hush when it was spoken. It was the kind of reverence that made her palms sweat because of the weight attached to it.

“You and Chrom are doing so well. I couldn’t be prouder,” Emmeryn said and it was as though the room grew warmer with the words. Lissa’s breath hitched in her chest.

“Emm—I—I love you so much!”

Her cup hit the table with a clatter, the cat bolting up at the sound. His eyes closed again as he groomed himself in feigned indifference. She only gave the cup a moment’s attention before throwing her arms around Emmeryn whose eyes widened slightly as she returned the embrace.

“You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for,” she said, poking a shoulder, the arm underneath firm and toned.

“Oh, well, it’s the axes,” Lissa said, grinning despite herself, “Even in peace time, it’s nice to be useful!”

“Hmm I wouldn’t mind learning a thing or two. I think you chopped up enough wood for the rest of the season the other day and before the snow hit, too. I normally trade some tonics with the neighbors.”

“Oh, uh, really? Like me teach _you_? Yeah, sure! When it’s nicer out!” she exclaimed, growing increasingly enamored with the idea. She had done some training before, but it would be nice to not be the one making knots of yarn or, as her younger self had, disappointing her tutors. She downed the rest of her tea, smiling even at the coolness. 

They never did get their chance as the temperatures rose and snow turned to rain, the sun only emerging on the final day of her stay. Instead, Emmeryn showed her how to crochet, a task Lissa seemed to pick up faster than the knitting though she wasn’t sure if it was because she already had plenty of trial and error with yarn at that point or if it truly was easier for her. 

As Lissa had anticipated, she was in tears, reduced to undignified sniffling in front of the knights as they said their farewells a few days later. She promised to visit again with her family, warning that there would be no rest in the house then. Emmeryn gave her the blanket she had used during most of her stay, a small flower that Lissa had crocheted embroidered on one of the sides.

**Author's Note:**

> End AN: I really wish that they had a chance to have a nice conversation in canon.: < This has been around in my WIP folder since August, so it’s nice to finally wrap it up.


End file.
